The internet is the best and worst thing to happen to society in a long time.  I hate what social media outlets have made people become and at the same time, I am a slave to it. I want people to read my blog, but at what cost? I want people to follow me on instagram but at what cost? I want people to listen to my music on sound cloud but I’m not going to beat people over the head to try and get them to listen.  I am HORRIBLE at self-promotion.  I like attention but I want to control it.  I am rambling but I’m being honest so just work with me here. My mom and grandma used to always tell me that no matter where you are to conduct yourself in a respectful manner because you never know who is watching.  Back in 2001 you could be in the club, stupid drunk, and passed out on a sidewalk and no one would be the wiser except for the people that were there. NOW? Now you can’t make a move good or bad or REGULAR without it becoming a meme.  I control my blog and my social media pages so I should be able to write what I want right? Yup. But I also know that once it’s out there, it’s there FOREVER.  I also don’t work for myself so there’s that piece as well.  I do random google searches on my name. Why? Because if I can google me, so can anybody else. So I hearken back to what grandma and mom used to say.  I don’t want to put anything out there that I would look back on later and be like, “WTF?” What actually sickens me is that people are selling their souls for likes. People are putting videos of people fighting in the streets, for likes. People are doing yoga, NAKED for likes. (No I’m not against being naked so don’t even go there.) People troll other people’s posts and say the most asinine things, for likes.  Now these people are free to do whatever they want, how they want but I look at them with a MEAN side eye. Why? Because I question their intentions. The social media market is undeniable and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t trying to tap into that. Maybe I care too much about what people think of me. Some people don’t care enough. Maybe I think too highly of myself. I’ll let that one sit for a minute…. (It may become a future post)

You have no idea how many things I SKIP writing about because I want to keep this blog light and airy. Today, people don’t like light and airy. They like controversial and ratchet, yes ratchet. (The only time you will see that word on this platform) The more like a bad reality TV show the better. (note the current presidency) The post that has received the most views to date on my blog? My post about Beyonce and her “Formation” video. This is not surprising to me because she is a worldwide phenomenon and a very popular subject. So then the thought popped in my head, “Maybe I should write about what EVERYONE else is writing about or write about things that I KNOW will create a buzz” but that’s not me and that’s not why I created this.  And just as I typed that, I feel like I must ask and answer that question, “Why did I start this?”  I like creative writing and I think I’m good at it.  People tell me that I’m a great storyteller and that they enjoy reading what I write because it sounds like I’m talking directly to them.  People that know me always say, “OMG I can hear you saying this!” That’s great and I love the feedback but that’s not why I do it. I do it because maybe something that I’ve written will stir up something in a person. Maybe my story is their story.  Maybe something they’ve been thinking, I have been able to convey with words. Sometimes I just need to get stuff off of my chest and sometimes my conversations with people inspire me to write. I need inspiration. I need it like I need air to breathe.

Another thought has occurred to me, “Step out of your comfort zone.” Alas, this is not me either. (But I am working on that) I’m willing to step outside of the box but not at the risk of my integrity. That may result is less traffic and followers but I’m ok with that. Part of getting more people interested in what I have to share has to do with sharing more often which is a work in progress. Yes I will continue to post selfies (because when the light and angle is just right, you MUST capture it) I will continue to post about my dog whom I have not written about here but rest assured he’s the most AWESOME dog in all the land, and I will continue to post wondrous pictures of food to make all of you jealous just because. Most importantly I will share more of myself, the good, the bad, and the ugly. (Within reason)